4 years ago1,000+ Views
Obedient was I Because it was the right way Never complaining Nor, did I have a choice My heart’s desire Doused by status So I obediently follow While my hearts cries fall on deaf ears Chained and hidden away Only to be shown For prides outbursts Like a trophy on display Children were an obligation Housework was my life Anything other than that Was idle talk for dreams alone Buttoned up Flesh shown, a no-no Only would it reveal For you and you alone Dreams I've had Were like stars dimming They were never to be fulfilled Because my future, is in your hands As I look on today Unlike me, they have freedom To love whom they want No one to forbid them Their dreams and futures Are theirs for the picking No chains trapping them Like you would a prisoner If I only had their chances I could be anything I want My dreams belonging to me, alone And my chains, rusting away to dust
Wow! Thank you @greggr... I hope me giving my meaning to writing this poem didn't overshadow what you were initially thinking of. I love writing poems really and writing them is very well, it's not hard, but then it's not easy either. Usually I have to be inspired by something, or someone. And since I am in my last year of highschool, it's hard to make time for creative writing. I do however appreciate all those who read it and commented. I didn't post it up for likes or anything, I did it because I wanted to share my love of writing with everyone :) I don't mind a little criticism (BIG or small), it's what helps me most. I guess we'd have to thank Shakespeare for inspiring me to write as early as I could. hahahaha, sorry for my rant and thank you everyone for reading! Kahmsahmidah :)
Another fantastic work! I really loved the note you left here in the comments about the meaning behind your work @Acezsinkillx. Don't get me wrong, I am always happy to interpret the meaning for myself, and I think that is a very important aspect of the poem, but it's also great to hear about the reasoning behind the poem's creation. Once again, great work.
I also really enjoyed this poem, @timeturnerjones. I loved how personal it was, yet somewhat restrained still - in keeping with the theme of the impulse to reveal but still being compelled to stay hidden. Thank you for sharing it, @Acezsinkillx!
@Acezsinkillx No problem, I enjoyed the rant! Writing, well you're right, it's not that it's easy or hard it just kind "is." Sometimes difficult, sometimes fun, sometimes exhausting! Either way, I'm happy to have heard your interpretation of your work in addition to my own--very enlightening. Looking forward to seeing more pieces when you have time to get to them, but no rush.
Thanks @timeturnerjones and @WordDoctor this is another one of my poems that I wrote before. I guess this is a little about my culture back in their day. Sexism those days were very adamant and women were objectified. So I just wanted to write about how women and girls alike should not take their freedom of gender for granted unlike those who had to fight for it :) But thank you both for the comments and feedback :)
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