sanityscout
5,000+ Views

Why Does My Kid Keeping Asking "Why?"

Why, why, why, why, why? My 3-year-old is definitely in "why" mode these days. You know what I'm talking about. "Let's put on your gloves!" "Why?" "Because it's cold outside." "Why?" "Because it's winter." "Why?" "Because that's the time of year it is." "Why, mommy?" <sigh> I have to be frank here. Usually, it's pretty cute. Sometimes, it's kind of annoying. I've forced myself to not say anything to him and let him keep asking and try to my best to answer most of his questions. I know it's a sign of an intense stage of curiosity that eventually I will be sad to see recede. But still I wonder - Why does he do that? How long will he do it? And why does it annoy me so much? I got some answers from Dr.Greene.com. Let's start with the last question: Why does it annoy me so much? Dr. Greene: "Weโ€™re frustrated for two reasons. Often we donโ€™t know the real answers to the innocent questions they ask, but even when we do, our answers donโ€™t slow the pace of their relentless questions. Thatโ€™s because weโ€™ve misunderstood their language and think that when they ask โ€œwhy?โ€ they mean the same thing we mean when we ask why. Our cause-and-effect answers miss the mark, and so they fail to satisfy." Okay, I see what you're saying, Dr. Greene. So what DO they mean when they ask why? "When children begin to learn real words, the words usually donโ€™t correspond exactly to the way adults use them. Often a specific word is used to indicate an entire category or visa versa. โ€œDogโ€ might mean any animal, while โ€œmeowโ€ might mean โ€œcatโ€ โ€” but only one cat. (...) by the time children are able to speak in sentences, it sounds deceptively like they mean the same thing we do. This happens at about the same time their curiosity, imagination, and creativity skyrocket." "After conversing with thousands of children, Iโ€™ve decided that what they really mean is, โ€œThatโ€™s interesting to me. Letโ€™s talk about that together. Tell me more, please?โ€ When Iโ€™ve connected with children and begun to spin a tale to answer this question, theyโ€™ve sat enthralled. There was no need to mention because, or therefore, or cause, or effect. They donโ€™t need to know why, all they need is animated attention and me saying whatever came to mind about that subject. After a brief interchange, we were both happy." Actually, that is really helpful! I had no idea that what he wanted was not my "Because" answer, but rather just to chat about what was going on. That does take the load of a little bit, doesn't it? So what happens to "why?" as they get older? "This communication dance doesnโ€™t end with the โ€œwhyโ€ phase of development. As children grow, their communication skills become more refined, and it is often more difficult to hear the โ€œThatโ€™s interesting to me. Letโ€™s talk about that together,โ€ underneath the surface. As we look for the invitation into our childrenโ€™s lives and relate to them at their level of interest, weโ€™ll find countless opportunities to engage with them. This communication dance is not an easy one. Every time we learn the steps, they seem to develop a new set of moves. So, what does โ€œMom, can I borrow the keys to the car?โ€ really mean? :-)" Oh boy, that I CAN wait for - maybe we should just stick to "Why Why Why, Mommy?" for now!
6 Comments
Suggested
Recent
@sanityscout - Thanks!๐Ÿ˜
Haha @Tati91 - well said!
Now I know why.
I definitely just try t turn the question back on them, too! But, like @sanityscout said, my cousins usually just want me to be the one talking so that they can engage with me. I usually find it pretty cute~!
@NorskyDesierto I've tried asking my son what he thinks the reason is, but he says "I don't know - I want you to say it!" Haha. Guess he really does want a conversation :)
Cards you may also be interested in
DIY: Turn a Box Into a Play Stove!
Become your child's hero when you turn a cardbox box, some old CDs and a few odds and ends into this awesome play stove! Here's how to do it, courtesy of Parents magazine via Craigslist Dad: Materials: - 12x12x22-inch box (approximately) - X-Acto knife, cutting mat, thick rope - 3 brads - 3 Play-Doh lids - 3 plastic caps - 4 CDs - 20ร—12-inch piece of cardboard, scissors - 3 adhesive-backed kitchen hooks - Hot glue gun - You can find pretty cheap play utensils at IKEA or any toy store, or even make those out of cardboard, too! The point is to have fun with it - so if you're missing any of this stuff, just improvise with what you have lying around! Let your child help out with some recycling suggestions. How To: - Position flat box so flaps will be at right and left sides. - Use an X-Acto knife and cutting mat to cut an oven door, as shown. - Cut two 1-inch holes, about 6 inches apart, on oven door for handle; thread a thick rope through and knot in back to secure. - Push a brad through the center of each plastic Play-Doh lid and use to secure to the front of the stove for controls above the oven door. - Hot-glue a plastic cap over each brad. - Assemble box and hot-glue flaps shut. - Glue the four CDs to the top of the box for burners. - Bend the right and left 4 inches of the 20ร—12-inch cardboard piece at right angles to create a backsplash about 12ร—12 inches. - Trim bent side sections into triangular shapes, keeping the full width at the base. - Round off the top of the middle section with scissors and hot-glue to back of stove, as shown. - Adhere plastic kitchen hooks to backsplash to hold play utensils.
What Are The Ridiculous Reasons Why These Kids Are Crying?
If you've ever babysat, parented, or pretty much existed within the general vicinity of a child for more than two minutes, you probably know that babies cry for the most nonsensical reasons. So do parents using Snapchat, who take that 24/7 baby-documenting that social media moms and dads are notorious for to a whole new level. They take a picture of their kid crying, they caption it with exactly WHY they're crying, share the picture, and boom. Instant hilarity. This is why people get convinced that babies and drunk adults are the same. Hey, you've got to let them teethe somehow, right? To be fair, waiting for freshly baked things to cool down is pretty much the worst. If it's a single-digit AM number, I'd be like this too. Imagine all the possibilities if you COULD though. He's not REALLY bad. Just a little misunderstood, right? Cue that 'Game Of Thrones' chant: "Shame! Shame! Shame! Shame!" It's okay. She's going to be grateful she didn't when she's older. I'd probably collapse on the floor too. The freakin' PRESIDENT! Hey, it doesn't mean he can't be upset! I feel like a LOT of little girls think they can marry their dads. I know some grown men that would cry because of this too. I appreciate how easy it is to entertain kids. "Here's a tampon." I like that he's all ready with his little fork too. Okay, but this picture actually made me want a pet lobster. Go away, brother! You're ruining the ambiance! This girl just needs to grab control of her life. AND her fork for that matter. So have you been around a little one who cried for stupid reasons? Or maybe YOU were that little one? I know my dad always reminded me of the first time he shaved off his mustache. I cried for hours because he didn't look like my dad anymore! @VIPFreak2NE1 @YumiMiyazaki @TurtleyTurtles @AlexTalley @atmi @CelinaGonzalez @iixel @humairaa @LysetteMartinez @drummergirl691 @ZoilaObregon @AnimeFan4Evr @SarahRegulski @poeticandfunny @tokyo514 @Outcastname @RachelParker @FrankilliMambo @EasternShell @supbroscene @Baoyi @VeronicaArtino @YunBao @buddyesd @HandsomeBacon
It's Not a Box, It's Parenting Magic! Box Crafts 1-3
I don't know about you, but I have vivid memories of having a blast playing with empty cardboard boxes when I was a kid. Other than the usual riding in a box imagining it was a car, boat or train, I also made a Fourth of July Flinstones-style truck out of several boxes and paint that I "drove" at our town's Independence Day parade, and also turned a giant box from Sam's Club into "My Own Place," in which I had a little bed out of blankets, a cardboard table and curtains that my mom made for me. I'm very happy to see my own toddler now automatically turning to empty cardboard boxes to act out his own imagination games. He got even more into cardboard box play when we got a great picture book from some friends called "Not a Box." I wrote about it in my picture book gift guide! http://www.vingle.net/posts/621669 Playing imaginative games and crafting with cardboard boxes is parenting magic - it's entertaining, encourages creativity, can be done indoors and is cheap! Here are 3 very fun things I found out there online for you and your kids to do with boxes: 1. Cardboard Box Shape Sorter From Parents.com: http://goo.gl/GjLJhI Entertainment plus shape learning all in one! Materials: - 18x18x18-inch box - circle compass - ruler - pencil - cutting mat - X-Acto knife - adhesive contact paper - colored masking tape, hot-glue gun (Although I think these could be whittled down to say, a box cutter, cube box and duct tape) How To: - While box is flat, draw desired shapes on all six sides using a compass and/or ruler and pencil. - Slide cutting mat behind shapes and cut out using an X-Acto knife. - Trace each cutout circle onto contact paper, then use a compass to draw a circle around it that is 1 inch larger in diameter. - Cut out the ring and adhere it to the corresponding circle cutout on the cardboard box. Repeat for other circles. - To outline squares, use strips of colored masking tape. - Use hot-glue gun to seal the box shut on both ends. - Give your child play balls and toys to put through the holes. 2. Dynamic Cardboard Aquarium From MollyMoo: http://goo.gl/rtyWCB I simplified her tutorial - since my goal is to do simple cardboard crafts without a lot of shopping or material-hunting. But you can go to the link to see her full tutorial for a fancier, more durable version. Materials: - Thin, wide box (such as a TV box) - Pencil - Box cutter - Rounded buttons - String or thick thread - Flat thumb tacks or hot glue gun - Your choice for background cover: paint, newspaper, construction paper, tissue paper - it's up to you! - Glue - Styrofoam balls or ovals - Things to decorate the fish - paints, markers, googly eyes, glitter, tissue paper - it's up to you! How To: - Draw lines on the box where you want the opening and cut it out. - Cut slits on the top of the box to act as sliding tracks, openings from which to hang the fish from buttons and string. - With rounded buttons, the child can grip and move their fish up and down the tracks. - Cut circles out of each side to act as viewing portholes and give some detail to the outside of the aquarium. - Paint or glue colored strips of colored paper to the background and outside of the aquarium to create the scene. - Paint the styrofoam for the fish, glue on googly eyes and decorate with your materials. - Loop the thread or string through the buttons and drop the thread through the slits with the button resting on top. - Attach the other end of the thread or string to the fish using a flat thumbtack or hot glue gun. - Enjoy! 3. Tissue Box Dinosaur Feet From A Bird and a Bean: http://goo.gl/41TMM8 Materials: - 2 empty tissue boxes - Either Mod Podge and tissue paper, or paint - Scissors - Duct tape - Sponge - Glue or hot glue gun How To: - Use the duct tape to reduce the size of the opening a little bit and to reinforce the opening as well. - If using paint, then have your child paint the box. Let dry. - If using tissue paper, then cut pieces of colored tissue paper with your child, adhere to the tissue box by covering with Mod Podge and let dry. - Cut triangles out of a sponge or cardboard. - Glue or hot glue triangles to the box. - Stomp around like a dinosaur! Be on the lookout for more awesome cardboard box crafts that I'll be posting in the future! I'll be posting them in my collections, which you can follow here: Indoor Fun with Toddlers: http://www.vingle.net/collections/1631792 Those Crafty Kids! http://www.vingle.net/collections/1520307
9
6
9