Serious talk: I will be forever alone. Why? Because as I sit typing this I have one eye on my screen and my other eye on my coworker who is on the other side of the office (Cute look right? Just picture it.) Ever since kindergarden I have been the girl that longingly stares at her crush all year long and does diddly-squat about it (Another reason why I might be forever alone: I use words like “diddly-squat”) Now don’t go thinking that I am a sad hat. At 23 years old I am living in a city I love, doing what I like, and living and working with some of my best friends. I’m not lonely at all, and am not desperate to be dating anyone at the moment, but I am constantly frustrated by my lack of confidence when it comes to a stupid crush. I get completely wrapped up in one person and am blind to everything else when they’re around. (I literally asked my coworkers “where is everyone today” when there was only ONE person missing from the office. Guess who. Send help.) My New Year’s Resolution was to be braver in this part of my life (aka actually hold one conversation with said boy/NOT RUN OUT OF THE ROOM WHEN HE WALKS IN) but who ever keeps those resolutions? So I am switching my tactic and using Valentine’s Day as my starting date for bravery. No, I am not going to do anything stupid like leaving a valentine on his desk (though I definitely did that at some point in middle school…) I am simply going to make a small effort each day to be a little more confident, a little bit braver. I think we can all do that, right?! Anyway, enough of my sob story…Here is some advice on stupid crushes that I am probably not going to take (because a part of me is very happy to become the crazy old maid that has awesome style and a cute dog) but I sincerely hope you do! ============ Not Freaking Out When Your Crush is Near: A Beginner’s Guide - Start with ‘Hello” I feel your panic already. “Do I say ‘Hi?’ ‘Hey?’ Is ‘Hello’ too formal?!” If you are the person that makes like an ostrich and buries their head in a metaphorical hole when your crush walks in, STOP. Here is our mantra for life: I will be a normal human today. I will be a normal human today. Just calm down and say “hey.” Even a simple “‘Morning” works. Better yet - hope that they say something first and just shoot their greeting right back at them. (But don’t rely on that, be sure you say something if they don’t) 2. Don’t Let the Conversation Drop Cool, you exchanged “Hey”s. Keep that flow going. (See video for example) Try asking how their weekend was, if they have plans for this one, or even just a “How ya doin’” (thick Jersey accent is optional though not recommended unless you are a 40 year old man from New Jersey) Just try to take your interactions a step at a time. Baby steps, everyone. Baby steps. 3. Do Not Stalk I am an incredible social media stalker (something I probably shouldn’t admit on social media) There is nothing I love more than going through Instagrams, Facebooks, and Twitters to see what else I can find out about people. This is especially true for people I may or may not be crushing on. Not only will it be odd when you slip up and ask your crush about something they never told you about (for example, he wrote on his friend’s wall that his laptop broke and you tell him ‘what a bummer’ the next day…) but you will start to create an idea of this boy or girl that isn’t real. Everyone seems cooler or more interesting online, so the more you “learn” about a person, the more your mental picture of them gets cloudy. 4. Stay True to You It is so easy to want to be the perfect guy or girl that you think your crush is looking for. Your crush loves listening to some obscure Icelandic drum circle? What a coincidence - you do too! False. You have never even dreamed of listening to an Icelandic drum circle. You listen to Bruno Mars. If you try to build a relationship off of shared interests that aren’t really shared, you’re just asking for trouble in the future. Your crush should like you for you, and if they don’t then you really don’t belong with them anyway. Keep it real. Now let’s put on big girl pants and be brave!