2 years ago
ChristinaBryce
in English · 6,935 Views
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Q: What do I do if my BF is watching porn?
Q: I love my boyfriend with all my heart, we've been going strong for 7 months now, a couple arguments here and there, but hey; who doesn't argue. I ended up going to bed early one night because I wasn't feeling so good (a woman's monthly, sorry, details are important in this story). The next morning I wake up before my boyfriend to find his "t-shirt", lube, and when I opened up my laptop, all my history was gone except for Facebook... now, I can't really point fingers and say he was watching porn. But it just never really left my mind and really kind of upset me, especially since I told him I didn't want him watching it. I don't, it makes me feel like he wants those fake porn stars more than me, and that I'm just the frump he goes to cause there's nothing better to go to. kinda seems like not that big of a deal, but it's just been eating at me and idk what to do. I'm afraid to fight with him about it. A: Okay, this might be an unpopular opinion, but I'm going to give it anyways! Guys watch porn sometimes. So do girls. It happens! For a number of reasons, really. Boredom, fantasizing, masturbation, inspiration for their own sex life. The list is pretty much endless. While not everyone watches porn, some people just do. Porn is not innately bad. It is a difference in reactions to it that can cause trouble for a relationship. Now, one thing that's really great is that it doesn't seem like you have trust issues with your guy (you trust him) but the issue more lies in not understanding why he is watching it. To you, it means that he isn't finding enough from you, and instead is looking to get some sort of satisfaction elsewhere. But are you sure that's why? It might be, but I think in most cases when it comes to porn, it's not! It's pretty natural for the body to just have urges, and sometimes, you just need some sort of sexual activity. That doesn't have to be anything deeper than a watching some porn. It isn't the watching porn that women like us should worry about! I hope for your sake and the sake of your relationship that you're just being a bit (rightfully!) sensitive, and you aren't actually subconsciously catching signals that he may be misbehaving (or preparing to do so). My advice is to talk to him about it. Bring up porn, ask him to be honest about whether he watches it or not. If he says yes, don't get mad: tell him you're curious about why, and be honest that it makes you feel a little bad about yourself in comparison. Open communication about it will help you two sort it out, I think! (Also, sorry for the picture! I couldn't find anything else PG that suited this post, hehe!)
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I dont know I mean youre not wrong in your advice @ChristinaBryce but if its making her feel like shes disrespected I dont think its fair to say she shouldnt! He might really not be well intentioned or be comparing her with these fantasy girls and thats not fair!