Imagine this: you've met someone great, and things seem to be going really well. There are some confessions, some discussions of what 'we' are, and some really great moments that let you know that this might be the one!
And then suddenly, it's not. They U-turn. Everything is suddenly different. And we then have to figure out why. I'm not saying the dump you or anything like that, but thinks are definitely different, and you don't like it.
Why did they change their minds? Maybe we'll decide it's our fault. Something about us is wrong, and worthy of rejection, so we jump to the conclusion that we caused this behavior and it's totally our fault that this happened.
So what do you do?
Show off your concerns!
Try something like this: "I’ve noticed __________ and _____________ and that’s confusing to me because you said ______________." That is much better than saying something like, “You said that you were going to ____________ and you haven’t. Is it because I’m not good enough?” which suggests that you aren't good enough (but you are!) So focus on the confusing behavior, not on blaming any one person.
Whatever it is that you’re expecting from them is also what you need to expect from you.
You already know this, but relationships are a two-way street my friend. If you expect them to come to you to discuss how things have been weird or what set them off, you need to do the same.
Let go of the picture you and they have painted in your mind and come into reality.
Sometimes, thinks won't be that fairy tale romance you've been thinking of: and that's totally OK! Just because it's not a fairytale romance doesn't mean it can't be a great romance, ok? So let go of your ideas of what it should be, and let it be what it is. That might help the "u-turn" your partner made feel like less of one!
Know when to fold.
As sad as it can be, sometimes, things just don't work out. And that's OK. When it becomes clear that your feelings will never truly match, be ready to fold. It's OK. Really!