4 years ago10,000+ Views
Q: So here’s the deal. I’m 16, and I’m in high school. But I feel much more mature and much older. This has kind of created a clash in my life (especially recently), because I’ve been pretty lonely. I’ve never had a boyfriend or been kissed before, but I’ve been told by countless people that I would be an awesome girlfriend (yes, they could just be saying that because they’re my friends, but I also genuinely believe that I would be a really great partner). It’s been difficult because I feel like most guys I know are too immature to be in a relationship with (am I being picky? I feel like I would just get annoyed in a relationship where I feel like my partner is immature and doesn’t want to contribute), and the ones that are mature have been great friends (but not more than that). I’m also not really willing to just go ahead and kiss, make out, or have sex with someone that I just met (which is how some of my friends have started their relationships). I keep telling myself to be patient, but after a while it just gets old and difficult to repeat after having repeated it for so long.
How do you suggest I address my loneliness and help myself endure being single and feeling like all the love I have could be shared with someone (in a romantic way), but isn’t? Also, should I settle for someone less mature because I may never be in a relationship at this rate?
Thank you!!! You’re awesome!! <3

A: Leave your advice in the comments! I'll add mine, too! Let's give this anon some L-O-V-E advice!

Every single piece of advice in the comments is spot on to me!!! I wouldn't recommend looking for someone "older" right now, but just be patient for a year or two, and then you'll find that you'll have a whole pool of new people to engage with! For now, focus on YOU and your friendships/family--you'll be happier that way, I think!
My opinion? Well, I know it can be boring and sometimes even frustrating to see all your other friends doing all these wild and oftentimes sexual things. But again, it’s just them being them. We all do things at our own paces. Some people have their first relationship at 13 and have some torrid love affair that ends in laughter or tears. And then some of us are more diligent, and want something more meaningful. You COULD settle for less. If you just wanted to get it out of your system, there’s nothing wrong with that. But you certainly don’t strike me as someone who wants that. So why bother? If you’re in no rush, and that’s what you really feel in your heart, rushing despite your feelings will only make you frustrated on the back-end. Once everything is said and done after you settle for someone, you’ll just be grumbling about how you wasted your time, and THAT is probably more frustrating than having done nothing!!! Hold tight: you'll find someone worth your time.
Oh don't you worry, I understand what you're going through and no you do not want to go out with one of those immature guys, it is really not worth it and it probably won't be fun, specially if u two don't even have a thing in common. my suggestion is to just wait, you're 16 if u wanna date and just go out and have fun then do it but u don't need a relationship with those guys trust me after high school in college you'll probably find someone more fitting for you. In the meantime may I recommend to you, the internet. believe it or not, no it's not all bad, personally I've made wonderful friendships with people online that I could not find in my school, I felt so limited but online there's so many people with actual opinions and their own way of viewing the world that is so beautiful and unrestricted to their hometown. I would say omegle but u might have some awkward encounters there and I just haven't been there recently so I couldn't judge but also there's this website called younow, I've met quite some amazing people there. Last but never least don't forget about your friends and family, they'll always be there for you, but well best of luck to you and just be patient :) you will find the one
I felt the same exact way when I was in high school. I don't know what advice to give because all that means now that I'm an adult is that I always date older/more mature guys. Just wait until college! Especially once you are in your major and studying the things that are interesting to you. You're going to meet so many guys who you can understand and connect with on a much deeper level because you're both going to have similar passions/lifegoals.
hello . I understand your frustration. I was exactly the same way. I did however have a few boyfriends, and girlfriends, but they were not good matches for me. All they wanted was sex, and they couldn't understand that even though I am not going to wait till marriage for that, I will not just give it up all easily. I am glad that I didn't. I am now 19 and came into contact with a wonderful soul, and we have been dating for quite a while. He was definitely worth my wait. I am not telling you what to do, but you are only 16. Enjoy your life, and enjoy spending time with friends and family. :) I wish you good luck on your prince hunt. ;D
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