(人们容易忘记的)维持幸福的恋爱、婚姻关系的10个方法
10 Forgotten Habits Happy Couples Have That Make Their Relationships Last
(人们容易忘记的)维持幸福的恋爱、婚姻关系的10个方法
1. 保持有共同的爱好并分享,不停寻找你们都喜欢的事物。
They Continually Share in Common Interests and Find New Things to be Interested in Together
不用太为找你们共同的兴趣而忧虑,可以就是一起躺在沙发上看电影这么简单。 Common interests do not need to be elaborate. They can be something as simple as enjoying cuddle time under a blanket while watching a movie.
一直维持着没有共同兴趣的状态,或是不和对方分享共同的爱好是很消极的。 Continuing through a relationship as individuals with different interests instead of sharing at least some common interests can be detrimental to the relationship in the long run.
2. 晚上一起回卧室睡觉。
They Move Towards the Bedroom Together Each Night
很多情侣因为日程不一样,常常忘记他们需要在晚上保有两个人在一起的时间。(比如:躺在床上一起聊着天然后睡着),最好是避免其中一个人看电视(或做别的),另一个人独自睡下的情况。 一个人要睡觉的话,另一个人最好是停下手上的事一起去睡。一起入睡的习惯对保持亲密关系是很重要的。 Many couples today live their lives on different schedules and have forgotten the importance of the intimate time needed before sleep. Instead of staying in the living room to watch television. while your partner goes to bed, join them in the bedroom. You can watch that show together while cuddling under the blanket.
3. 不在生气的时候去睡觉。
They Never go to Sleep Angry
这是维持幸福关系的情侣是非常重要的,可以说是核心原则。 The happiest of couples say that this is their cardinal rule.
在生气的时候入睡的话,在这之前没有解决的问题和郁闷的感觉会起码持续到第二天下午(然后可能爆发)。
Going to bed angry can lead to unresolved issues and feelings of resentment that go beyond one evening of disagreement.
在入睡之前要确认这次吵架会不会改变我们的关系,改变我们还相爱的事实。
Before drifting off to sleep, recognize this battle does not define your relationship and reassure your partner that you love them.
但是还是有很多情侣无视这条核心原则,在生气的时候入睡。这个变成习惯的话很有可能会破坏婚姻关系。
Today, too many couples ignore this cardinal rule and drift off to sleep angry. If this becomes a pattern, it can do irreparable harm to their relationship.
4. 一天开始和结束的时候互相拥抱、亲吻。
They Hug and Kiss to Start the Day and Hug and Kiss to End It
有心理学家表示,拥抱有利于身心健康。
Psychologists suggest that hugs create feelings of positivity and better health.
拥抱时,身体会释放出一种荷尔蒙,让人感觉依附、连接、信任和亲密。
Andrea F. Polard, Psy.D suggests hugs release the hormone oxytocin, which elevates feelings of attachment, connection, trust, andintimacy.
情侣有时候也忘记要触摸对方。也有部分人一整天也不拥抱或是亲吻,在丢失亲密感的的情侣关系中,会一点点出现问题。
Too often today, couples forget to touch their partners and some go through days without good hugs and kisses. The lack of intimacy can eventually take a toll on a relationship.
5. 信赖对方。
They Trust Their Partner
信任可以创造出更大的信任,怀疑会引起更多的怀疑。
幸福的情侣观众中互相信任是基本原则。对对方信任,在遇到困难的时候才能互相依赖。
“Trust is the bedrock for building a strong relationship.” By placing your confidence and faith in your partner, happy couples can believe and rely on their partner when things get tough.
6. 比起“对不起”,更多说“谢谢”吧! They Say Thank You Instead of I’m Sorry
在人与人的关系之中,要把焦点放在更积极的一面。理解对方的某种心理时,不说“对不起”而应该说“谢谢”。
By turning the focus to something positive and thanking a partner for putting up with something instead of apologizing for something, they eliminate the acknowledgment of a negative behavior.
7. 在对方取得成就时,祝福TA吧。
They Celebrate in their Partner’s Accomplishments
幸福的情侣会为了对方实现自己的目标而鼓励TA,并且一直支持TA。 Happy couples encourage their partners along their journey of personal goals. They ask them about their progress and encourage them to keep moving forward.
8. 持续为对方做一些小事。
They Continually Do Small Things for Each Other
小的行动也有大的回报。幸福的情侣会一直为对方做一些看似不太重要的小事。像在午饭的时候递给对方一张写着“我爱你”的纸条一般的小事。
Small actions equal big rewards in a successful relationship. Happy couples continuously do small things for their partner. It could be something as simple as slipping a note in a lunch that says “I love you,”
9. 互相认知对方的感觉。
They Acknowledge Each Others Feelings
幸福的情侣也并不是无条件同意对方的观点,但是至少可以认知对方的感情,并且认为那是很重要的。
Happy couples don’t have to agree on everything, but they do say that at least acknowledging the other person’s feelings is important in a successful relationship.
不能认知对方的感情的时候,对方会感到很深的伤害。
By not validating a partner’s feelings, hurt feelings can run deep.
10. 保持幽默。
They Keep a Sense of Humor
幸福的情侣为了解决不舒服的状况,会知道如何使用幽默感。并且知道如何让生活更轻快。
Happy couples have learned to use their sense of humor as a tool to diffuse uncomfortable situations and keep a lighthearted outlook on life.
-- 我也回顾了我和老公的关系,这10点确实都是非常重要的。虽然是小事,但是老公会常常称赞我,在他心情不好的时候,我也尽力不去说不好听的话。 希望这些对你也有帮助~ 你觉得什么最重要呢?
图片采自:http://www.lifehack.org