In my last relationship, I said “I love you” a lot and at one point it was the truest words from my mouth.
But there came a time that those words were used for much more, comfort, reassurance and sadly it was said just to fill empty voids of time and conversation.
I can’t quite pinpoint when that switched, it all blurred so well together. It no longer meant that I loved you or that I was in love with you. It was almost a reflex of mine every time I felt unsure of myself, a way to keep going even when I must have known it was time to stop.
I want to say “I love you” and feel it spark my body every time those words touch my mouth.
I want to cherish those words and use them sparingly, holding back for fear of running out of those sparks. Hold them back until one day, I don't need to, and someone special can know just how much I love them.