4 years ago5,000+ Views
According to the Glaad website millions of Americas say they do not know someone who is gay. However, everyone knows at least one person who is left handed. The percentage of people who are left handed make up the same percent of people who are gay. That's a lot of people! So here are some tips on how to be a good Ally. If you want further information please check out the Glaad website. They will be able to help.
Be Open Minded There are so many variations of sexuality and gender that even I get confused sometimes. My friend created a power point that I actually use as a reference. Being anything besides heterosexual can encompass a large scope of feelings. You can be asexual, cisgendered, trans, gay and everything in-between. Just because your friend says they are gay does not mean that its as simple as they like the same sex. Keep your mind and heart open until they figure it all out.
Get the fuck over using “gay” as a negative. The next time I hear someone say, “that is sooooo gay” instead of lame or stupid I will freak out. Don’t even get me started on the word faggot. Just typing that has given me anxiety. Being a good Ally means completely changing simple phases that society has unfortunately ingrained into our poor minds. Gay, faggot, flamer, fairy, are all hurtful to the gay community. Stop using them. And please don’t give me that, “But some of them call each other faggots”. Until you get the shit kicked out of you just because of who you love, keep your trap shut.
If you see something, Say something Being a good Ally isn't just leading an ear to your friend, although that is extremely important. Being a good Ally is stopping people from hurting the LGBTQ+ community. If you see or hear homophobic actions, speak up! I know that it is scary and confronting someone is difficult, but imagine how hard it must be for the person who is the focus of that hate. The Ally force believes in you!
Confront your own homophobia or prejudice. This is a hard one. Most people, no matter how loving, open-minded or accepting, have some engrained homophobia apart of them. No one blames you for that! We have been raised on homophobic slurs and to fear anything that veers away from normal. Realize it is ok and overcome your prejudice. You can do it, and your friend will be better off for it.
Just be a good friend No matter what keep in mind that being apart of the LGBTQ+ does not make your friend or family member into a totally different person! Yes they will feel more comfortable in their own skin, be more willing to share their feelings and overall be happier once you know…but how is there any negatives in that!! The person you became friends with is still there, and your relationship will grow even strong when they know you are their Ally.
I feel blessed growing up in the city and having parents about 25 yrs older than the avg parent. They didn't believe luckily in any discrimination coming from the old world themselves. They exposed reality to me whereas most children were sheltered. I feel many people may not be let's say kindly well versed in life and can be a little scared of what they do not know. I grew up living 1/2 block down from our towns most now famous Drag Queen! I was about 10 when he finally left his home to live on the streets in his world of various stages and to become famous to now Calendar Girl! Unfortunately, he had a very difficult life and his health suffered. Many people don't get his life style. My Dad would say when I was little run into the house call the Police as someone just rolled him out of their car and my Dad and Mom would go try to help him. I have friends and relatives of all orientations. I never think about what someone is or isn't because they are just who they are just as they are whatever their ethnicity is and they are simply a person. I feel a person is either nice or not. I don't prefer ignorant not nice people. I am a domestic abuse survivor and straight as if that matters but believe me I have seen people of all financial status', diversities, etc and a person can just be bad because that is who they are not because of any other reason. I just walk away or don't listen to ignorant people because they are always right on their minds. Hopefully we will have a much better more peaceful and accepting world some day! We have, are and continue to make progress in every way! Yeah! Thanks to everyone and God and our higher power's!
@orenshani7 well I think part of what this entire post is detailing is the specific ways that a person can be a good friend. Even good, well-meaning people can mess up sometimes, so it can be helpful to have a sense of what things are most important to recognize in yourself and in others that could be intrinsically hurtful or unsupportive, and work to correct that.
@redridergirl I totoally agreee when you say that ignorant people will never believe they are wrong! it is so frustrating. But thats amazing that you were able to grow up in such an understanding and loving environment! Its terrible though that people still harass others who just live a different lifestyle then others. it really grinds my gears!! But thanks for the positivity !!! keep on keeping the good fight !
@lizamone, I think the last paragraph of the article says it all. Just be a good friend. What else need to be said?
@orenshani7 I can see what you are saying, it is so hard to not generalize. I am curious as to what generalizations you are referring to! Do you see a place where things could have been clearer in this article?
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