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How to be a Writer

If you want to truly be a creative force, make sure to use only the best, handcrafted tools.
Now, this will take a little doing, but you'll thank me for it. In the bottom part of Wyoming, south of Table Rock, off route 80, at the origin of Bitter Creek, there stands an ancient Green Ash tree. This tree is named Albasiyl, and she is the totem for all of the creative energy in North America.
Plead with Albasiyl to deliver unto you but a single bough of her immensity. You must plead your case at Albasiyl's roots for three days and two nights, consuming only water from a goatskin hide. as the third night turns to dusk, Albasiyl will drop a single, thin bough at your feet. Thank her graciously for the gift, no fewer than five times.
Taking this most precious gift, Travel northwest to Bandon, Oregon. In Bandon, purchase three individually wrapped caramels. You will need these later. Also pack enough provisions for a week of camping.
On Bandon beach, you will see a large outcropping of stone in the middle of the vista. Taking the bough you received from Albasiyl, climb atop the stone. You must wait atop this stone until a mighty thunderstorm arrives. It shouldn't be longer than a week, at most.
When the storm breaks over Bandon, Stand tall and raise the bough over your head, a signal to the spirit of creation. You will not need to stand long. Soon, you will be swept up by a gigantic sky-whale, invisible to the naked eye. This sky-whale is called Aepherion, and he is wise beyond years. He will bear you up to the cloud palaces of Yawva, mother spirit of all creation.
After Aepherion has deposited you at the gates to the cloud palace, give him the caramels that you brought with you. He will be gracious, and bestow upon your forehead the mark of the Aepheri. This mark will allow you to walk amongst the cloudways of the palace.
Harken, aspiring creator! You near the end of your quest. Face the cloud gates, and they shall open for you, mark-bearer. Make sure to keep a firm grasp of the bough of Albasiyl as you tread through the threshold; fierce winds await you inside the palace.
These winds serve to test your true resolve, seeking to determine whether you can withstand the airy, turbulent nature that besets a true creative force. If you can make your way through the winds, you will find yourself at the seat of Yawva. Do not look directly upon her until instructed; she is pure creation, and will sear your eyes from your head if you are heedless.
Kneel upon one knee before Yawva, and present the bough of Albasiyl. Stake your desire, to be a true writer, and await her judgement. It may take some time, but you will feel no need of food, or water, or rest. You are within the cradle of creation, and so your every need is satisfied by virtue of being there.
If she deem you worthy, after all the trials you have faced, Yawva will take from you the bough of Albasiyl and shape it into the Pen. She will bestow this greatest of all gifts upon you, along with a vial of her own essence as Ink.
With this Pen will many a masterpiece flow, so long as you treat it with the respect is deserves. The Ink will shape many a work of art, layered with emotion and the essence of being.

Congratulations, adventurer. You are now a writer, in true form.

Aha! I see what you mean about this being inspired by Gaiman in some ways. This seems like a pretty fun and reasonable way to become a writer to me...
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Jungkook No Longer Baby Boy (+19)
Que tal peeps! WE ARE STILL COUNTING DOWN TO JUNGKOOK'S BIRTHDAY IN THE AMS COMMUNITY. THIS IS A QUICK FANFICTION THAT CONTAINS MATURE CONTENT! Jungkook has always been like a little brother to you and you always looked after him, especially when the guys picked in him. You were planning a special birthday surprise for him with the guys. "He should be happy he gets a cake." Yoongi scuffed. "Well well now lets not be too mean Yoongi...he is the youngest." I said while writing down ideas. You and the guys came up with a plan. You and Jin would bake a cake and cook food. Hobi and Tae would clean up while Namjoon and Yoongi decorated. "Namjoon please don't break anything." Hobi laughed. Namjoon rolled his eyes and laughed. The next day it was super hot in the office and all you wanted to fo was take a shower. You rushed home and jumped into the shower. Jin would be shopping for food with Namjoon while the others bought decorations. Jungkook would be at the library volunteering so everything should be finished then. The water felt so good as you allowed it to hit your skin. You had your relaxing body wash. You inhaled the lavender scent and lathered up your body sponge. You began cleaning and singing when you seen a pair of eyes looking in the small crack of the door. You paused thinking you seen something else. You didn't know if your mind was playing tricks on you. Then you looked back and no one was there. You finisjef showering and walked down to your room. You noticed Jungkook's door was cracked. This was strange cuz he always locks his door. You pay no mind and get dressed. The crew arrived and you all get to preparing the surprise birthday for Jungkook. You were pleased how everything played out. Namjoon only broke 3 things which is good. You walked to your room to get an extra present you brought for Jungkook when you noticed your pantry drawer was opened. Your neatly arranged panties were all a mess. You picked up the present wrapped in shiny red wrapper and seen that Jungkook's door was cracked wider. You walked down the hall and heard odd noises. "Yass gosh noona..." You peeped your head in without makjng a sound and saw Jungkook with your panties in his hand. He was licking a pink pair with a red pair wrapped around his man hood. Jungkook was stroking himself. You found yourself shook for a moment. But then you began watching out of enjoyment. Your breathing goth heavier. Jungkook slowly his hand motion and grinned. "I know you are watching me noona." You covered ur mouth. But a gasp escaped ur wet lips. "Jungkook why do you have my panties? "Noona you know I want you. I made that clear last week when I spanked the hell out of you. Remember you made me promise not to tell." You walked into his room and closed the door. "Shh boy that was a mistake." "A mistake?" Jungkook said while raising his eyebrow. He smiled while looking at the gift I had. "Nice wrapping but do you know what I really want noona?" Jungkook smirked. Jungkook walked closer to be still hard as a brick and stood behind me allowing his hard on to rub between by cheeks. He let out a groan. "I know you been with all the guys nonna, they brag about it. I want you now." Jungkook said. "Jungkook...look those days are behind me. I'm no longer group banging trash." "Okay I will just spread the word at work." Jungkook laughed. "Fine Jungkook." I hissed. Jungkook pushed me on my stomach while sliding my shorts to the side. He was happy to see I had in no panties. He stuffed a pair or my panties he had in my mouth and plunged deep inside me without mercy. The pink wet panties muffled my scream of pleasure. Jungkook pounded me hard and fast. "Noona you were all wet from watching me?" Jungkook smacked my butt hard. "ANSWER me. You like watching me wack off?" I nodded as he pulled me hard into him. He switched so we were facing the mirror and began pounding me hard hitting all my spots. "Look at that little face. You love it noona. Yoongi said you like it rough." I surprised Jungkook and pusjed him back on his butt. I climbed on top of him. "You gotta do more to get me off little baby boy." I said while grinning. I began riding him hard and fast while pulling his hair. He began sucking my right breast as I rode him. "Yass that's a good baby boy." I moaned. I could see he was coming to the edge and so was I. The room echoed of slapping skin. "Noona yasss! Oh shit!" Jungkook moaned while exploded in me. The explosion made me go over the edge. My vision was so blurry. Suddenly the crew busted in "Happy Birthday Jungkook!" "Shit looks like we got to the party late." Yoongi blurted. 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