Our family is loud with varying personalities, and the extended family is the same. Meet the family.
All of them. We've got first cousins, second cousins, cousins through marriage, the cousin who we regret flirting with at the bar, because tio forgot to mention his messy hookup from 20 years ago.
Then you have that cousin who you're trying to figure out how you two are related.
Me: From which aunt or uncle did Sue come from?
Mami: Aye, I think it was your great uncle from Jersey. His 2nd marriage. Or third. No, no.
His fifth. You remember his wife -- she came over for Christmas 10 years ago. Sweet woman.
The Really Pretty Aunt
All your friends will rave about how hot your aunt is. And you know she is. And you feel awkward. And wish you can be as flawless as she is.
The Drunk Uncle
He arrives to the party drunk, and he finishes the night more drunk. He'll end the night with being passed out on the porch, but he doesn't bother anyone. He's chill. A chill drunk.
The Great Aunts
They're up there in age, but they can still party. They drink more than the younger folks, and they still bend over to shake their booty to reggaeton. Shout out to my great aunts: I am talking about you ladies. Get it, tías.