2 years ago
paulisadroid
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Paul Rudd is Ant-Man but He Doesn't Have a Clue
Ant-Man came out today, you think to yourself during your walk to work. You can't remember how many posters you saw on your way to the office but you saw enough. And even though you're only sort of, kind of, probably, maybe interested in the movie, you couldn't get Paul Rudd out of your head.
After smoking a couple of cigarettes, you realize that Paul Rudd will forever be ingrained in your head as Josh from the 1995 movie Clueless
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You watched the movie at an age that was, most likely, too young. You don't remember the exact specifics of why you were watching this movie on VHS but you remember that you were. Part of you believes that some of your older cousins wanted to watch Brittney Murphy, Stacey Dash, and Alicia Silverstone be beautiful, the other part of you believes they were watching it "ironically". That they were hipsters before people called other people hipsters.
You didn't care though, you were locked in and, somehow, attached to Josh. You looked around and saw your cousins and their friends then you looked down at yourself. You knew what you wanted to be. You wanted to be in college, aware of the world around you, and drink juice out of the bottle without pouring it into a glass. You wanted to wear flannel shirts and be witty.
You weren't interested in the narrative of the film or how Josh ended up with his sister (which is something that confused you back then and is still weird to you, today). You liked and loved all the other stuff about him. How he seemed a lot more, uh, real to you than any of the other characters in the movie.
So, this weekend, your brother will take you and his kid to watch Ant-Man. And you'll try your best [and I really mean try and fail] to pay attention to the movie. You'll try to enjoy it even though you're not interested in the hero or the action or the direction.
Instead, you'll be thinking about Josh in Clueless and how -- for some reason -- now is fighting crime as a tiny Ant-Human. You'll think about the way your life turned out and how you're pretty aware of current events and the way you only buy flannels and when you talk to people you your best to come off as a witty, intelligent person even though you -- sometimes -- come off as a dick.
You won't get upset about this. You'll actually laugh about it internally. And after the movie, you'll smile to yourself and lie to your family that you liked the movie.
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