You've hit the jackpot. You're finally meeting up one-on-one with that sexy someone you've had your eye on for ages. When you picture them, your heart beats a little faster. You're incredibly nervous, and yet, you can't wait for the day to arrive.
Whether you're getting together for dinner, drinks, or a walk in the park, this card will teach you everything you need to know to become a master of seduction.
This is a key skill of seduction. It's a subtle yet clear way of communicating your interest in being more than friends. Establishing that first contact is vital to the art of seduction; it breaches the wide gap between acquaintances and friends, and opens the way for more physical contact later on.
To master this skill, you need to be comfortable with your own body. Self-confidence and self-love help a lot here.
One of my favorite moves is the flirty touch on the arm. Ladies, lightly touch them when you're emphasizing a point, or laughing at something funny they said. Guys, a great move is the light shoulder or back touch. It can be a friendly gesture or a very intimate one, depending on how it's done.
You can try offering them your hand as you lead them through a crowded bar, or nudging them after you've said something funny.
There are millions of ways to initiate physical contact with someone; you just have to be creative! Of course, pay attention to the signals, and learn to tell the difference between a wanted touch and an unwanted touch. If the person you're interested in doesn't reciprocate with a few flirty touches of their own, you should probably back off.
Playing the Game
Flirting is a game. You and your sexy friend are the players, and the object of the game is to artfully steer what was once a mere friendship into something more than that. But how do you do that? Well, you've got to get into the playing mindset. Being playful is an excellent way to move your boring, average conversation into dangerously flirtatious territory.
That's why I recommend teasing! Teasing someone gets them laughing and blushing, and establishes a playful dynamic between the two of you. That playful dynamic can carry you all the way to more serious physical contact. For example:
You tease him. He teases you back. You give him a playful shove. He tickles you. You get mad and tickle-attack him. He grabs you, suddenly you're in each other's arms and... poof! The magic happens.
Play a game. Odds Are is a great choice; Truth or Dare works too. Anything competitive is awesome, because that sometimes escalates into physical teasing. Sports are a fun way to bond as well, if that fits into the context of your hangout; using your bodies together, getting all sweaty... what's more suggestive than that?
Dressing the Part
This might go without saying, but if you want to seduce someone, you've gotta dress to impress. Don't wear your favorite, most comfortable burlap sack; wear that sexy bodycon LBD! Guys, dress it up a little. Not so much that she feels out of place or underdressed, but enough to show her that you're trying. When someone puts in the effort to impress me, I always feel ever-so-flattered. It also inspires me to put in the effort to impress them right back... in other ways. ;D
Being seductive isn't about being Mr. Smooth, or never tripping over yourself. It's about projecting an attitude of confidence in yourself and your desires. It's about knowing what you want, and testing the waters to see if your sexy companion wants the same thing.
You don't need to worry if you're naturally shy or a little clumsy. In my opinion, the sexiest and most seductive people are the ones I can laugh with, have fun with, and who I know are confident enough in their body and their abilities to keep up with me.
Why is confidence important? Well, nobody likes being with someone who's constantly apologizing for their body, or checking to see if their makeup is smudged, or feeling bad about themselves because they forgot to shave. Nothing turns me off more than a guy apologizing to me; nothing. My advice is, don't waste time on negatives. Just own your body and do what feels right. Rock it. Work it like Beyoncé. Know that you are sexy, and that the other person is excited to be spending time with you! Practice projecting confidence, and pretty soon, you'll be feeling confidence.
A Change of Scenery
If your ideal version of seduction involves something that generally doesn't occur in a public place, you're going to have to figure out how to work that change of scenery.
If I'm in a bar with a guy and I want to kiss him, I might ask if he wants to step outside for a bit. If you're a smoker, that's always a great excuse. Or maybe you're the kind of person who likes to get some fresh air and take a walk. Invite your sexy friend along.
If you get the vibe that you both want to be alone together, but you're not sure how to swing it, here's my advice: have ready-made excuses waiting at home. When we were in college, my crazy best friend had a move that she swore by – she would ask guys if they wanted to go back to her room and smoke weed. That's basically the move, but it doesn't have to be an illegal drug. Here are a few other ideas you can try.
"Want to go back to my place and watch _______?" (insert movie you guys talked about earlier, or a funny TV show)
Or, if you have a six-pack or some cocktail ingredients on hand: "Would you like to have a nightcap back at my apartment?"
Keep a great bottle of wine around: "I know you like white wine – you've got to try this incredible chablis my French cousin recommended to me."
Head back to hang with your friends at home, then at some point, move the conversation to your bedroom. "It's a little loud out there."
Maybe you're way cooler than I am, and you have a record player. I would LOVE for a guy to suggest we head back to his place to listen to some old vinyl and drink a few beers.
And those are just a few I came up with off the top of my head. There are plenty of ways to work the change of scenery; you just gotta be creative. ;)
Show You Care
Finally, never underestimate the power of showing you care.
Listen intently to what they're saying. Ask questions. Compliment them. And above all, be genuine. Authenticity and showing genuine interest in what someone things and feels are both very charming qualities, and when you're a master of seduction, charm is your biggest weapon.
Put away the distractions. Stop checking your phone; put it on silent. Make them feel listened to, cared about, like they're someone incredibly fascinating to you. And I mean, they are, right? Else why would you want to seduce them? You shouldn't have to fake this part, and if you do, maybe you should reconsider your priorities. For seduction to be fun for everyone, both people have to want it, and both people have to be getting something out of it. Make sure that's always true. Sure, you're getting something you want, but make sure you're giving them something too!
You are now equipped with some of my best tools in the art of seduction. Go forth, my student, and conquer. I give you my blessing. But make sure you use what you have learned for the powers of good, and not evil – remember that consent is super important, and unwanted advances are a no-no. When in doubt about what your partner wants, it's always best to just be open and ask.
If you want more tips on romance, dating, and how to be a sexy badass, check out my Modern Day Romance collection. :) I update it all the time, so look forward to some pretty great cards in the near future (if I do say so myself). (See? Confidence! XD)
And if you have any questions about seduction, love, relationships... I'm always here! :)