As long as I remembered, everything around me shouted shallow, mystery and mindless. I was surrounded by humanity.
When I was young, like every other child, the princesses and all the tales about them amazed me. For hours I read story's of kindness, beauty, hope and simplicity. I saw the movies about them and watched every step and worth of them imitating with the hope of becoming such fearless and kind princess like them. I believed. I believed they were real. I dreamed with this trifling amount kindness, beauty, hope and simplicity that was to others, actually existed and these people would overwhelm my heart with their substantial that I wanted to follow.
"If you stay kind, and simple, and if you continue to believe in kindness and hope even after seeing the world, your heart will always remain alive"
My mother was my princess. But the dreams end, the words become meaningless, and the heart gets corrupted, and finally... people just Change. The hero I had in times, become addicted to be him self. To be recognized. To be someone worth of the name, He said once. Even if the way to do it was actually worthless, and the result grievous, and the path lonely, he followed it, without looking back, without a second thought. All for the Humanity recognition. Worthless.
I don't know what I've become. Careless maybe. Kind? True? Simple? I wish I was a child. The thought came to me like a lightning. A child. With everything even when it has nothing. Hope and dreams. I wanted to be what I expected. I wanted to be a good person. But I wasn't unhappy with my self. I just felt, empty.
I never realized I was standing face to a wall of my bedroom. I focused on it wile regaining consciousness of what surrounded me. The door was opened, and my mother watched me with a placid emotionless face. In a thoughtless move, I slowly shut the door.
All my life I shuted my self from others. I never felt the need to share my thoughts though everyone wanted to know. My family fame was mine to, and isn't with happiness I say this. All the attention is useless to me. And all I know is that sometimes is in the dark when I feel less lonely.