2 years ago
danidee
in English · 9,917 Views
likes 38clips 7comments 31
Let's Talk Smack: Gravity Is A Huge Jerk!
Have you ever fallen on your butt when you were playing outside as a kid? Or maybe you were running to answer the front door, ended up tripping over something, and landed on your face?
Well, friends. That's called gravity. And it's a supreme d-bag.
Gravity plagues the lives of a staggering 99.99% of people here on Earth. The remaining 0.01% is Keanu Reeves, who understands that this planet is but a fabricated reality and secretly knows how to fly.
Sure, Keanu.

Anyway. Here are some reasons gravity is a big jerk.

It destroys a perfectly good dance number.

And really throws a wrench in a gymnast's routine.

It makes it uncomfortable to text before bed.

And allows birds to poop on you whenever they please.

It can 'crash' your wedding.

And invites itself to graduation.

It always acts like such a diva on the runway.

And while gravity can't tear it UP, it's always shutting things DOWN.

It always wants to trip you up when you're trying to look smooth.

And it won't even let you pour a bowl of cereal without taking a spill.

So let's all band together to say "Gravity, you suck!"

Then let's all become astronauts. Because astronauts always have the best life.

(I mean, until they're forced to explore wormholes, that is. Too soon?)

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@jlee37 OUCH.. I bet you get all sorts of bumps and bruises.
2 years ago·Reply
20
I literally drop my phone on my face twenty-four seven. F THAT
2 years ago·Reply
30
@TessStevens I felt bad for this girl lol. She got clocked RIGHT in the jaw.
2 years ago·Reply
20
@jlee37....you are describing my life to a T! It's a running joke in my family that, if it can be spilled, Amye WILL do it and usually on me! Thank God we live in a 1 story house. However, we have tile in a few places in our house and it's usually my "downfall" (pun intended) ;-)
2 years ago·Reply
20
@Amye1 you're not alone lol we got jackets :)
2 years ago·Reply
20